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Saturday, June 25, 2011

What's up Doc?

So Maya needs her tonsils out. Her tonsils are, apparently, huge and block her throat and nose. This explains constant mouth breathing and cat breath she has. She needs surgery which makes me scared, but I'm sure she'll be fine.
I made an appointment with a pediatric ENT (whoo-whoo, bring on the insurance card!!!) and filled out all the forms online preemptively, knowing that if I wait for the appointment time to do that, one of these things will happen:
a. My kids will tear the forms apart, Sonya will probably eat it.
b. While I'm filling out the forms, Maya will bite, pinch or hit her sister, or other children present
c. They will scream relentlessly
To avoid the aforementioned calamities, I arrived to the office fifteen minutes early, with all the information easily accessible. Sonya was brought along since Husband was busy and I have no one else to watch the kids. The girls got suspicious when we arrived, and clung to my skirt. Sonya hid under it and told everyone from under the protective cover that I'm HER mama. All right, so far it's all good.
Then the receptionist needed my ID and insurance card. I threw sippy cups at the girls to keep them occupied and turned my back to them for a moment. Big mistake - screaming ensued almost immediately. Sonya bit Maya or Maya hit Sonya, I don't know. Sonya screamed until we were called in, and then I heard an obvious sighs of relief from the waiting room, where all other normal children were quietly sitting next to their parents. Whatever bitches. My kids are just lively and active. Yes, that's the word.
Because Sonya was screaming so much, all the nurses assumed she was the one being looked at. Appointment went fine. Sonya bit the doctor, Maya dropped the chair on my foot, and, upon our exit, when offered lollipops, they both wanted a particular color (that changes every time, by the way). I think the office staff was relieved when we departed. The doctor told me "Oh, they are so fun!" while slowly backing away from us.
By the time we got home, both were sticky from lollipops from head to toe and hyped up on sugar. I was left to contemplate the surgery and its risks.
The end.

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